Swansea (h) 18.12.17

“There goes my hero, watch him as he goes. There goes my hero, he’s ordinary”

The roast dinner revolution rumbled on apace. Five games unbeaten now for Partizan Walton and it’s become apparent that a bit of defensive organisation goes a long way in the modern game, although it may upset a few who believe that every game should be a 5-3 feast of flowing football. Not that this one was short of goals mind.

Large Samuel kept faith in the XI that shithoused a point in midweek at Newcastle, with the only change being Sandro for Niasse on the bench. The latter apparently flounced off after being told his services were not required for the evening but that’s unconfirmed. One who did sit in the stands was Yannick Bolasie, back in contention for the first time in over a year.

I can probably gloss over the first half hour because absolutely fuck all happened. Nothing of note anywhere, bar a ludicrous decision from the portly Jon Moss to book Mason Holgate for a sliding challenge that Maldini or Beckenbauer would have been proud of. The fat fucking tit. Not long after, that organisation I mentioned earlier took a brief moment off to go for an early half time pie or whatever and the visitors struck first blood. A corner whipped in and messrs Williams, Holgate et al decided not to bother clearing it and the ball fell to Leroy Fer, him of the balsa wood knee, to slide home from a yard.

This spurred the lethargic blues and the home crowd into action and on the stroke of half time, Everton drew level. Lennon “drew” the foul from the doppelgänger of Gomez Addams and Moss pointed to the spot. Rooney’s initial kick was excellently turned into the post by Fabianski but the rebound fell kindly to the feet of Calvert-Lewin who turned home and Goodison breathed a sigh of relief. Half time.



No changes at half time, despite the malaise that seemed to be omnipresent in the first 45 minutes, and it seemed that the frustration would continue as the hosts seemed unable to make things happen going forward. It took the introduction of Tom Davies on the hour to provide the necessary spark. Within minutes of coming on, the youngster strode forward and fed the ball wide to Sigurdsson. The Icelandic forward cut in from the wing, steadied himself and unleashed a swerving, powerful thunderbastard into the far post that was an absolutely filthy way to sink the hopes of his former side.

Suddenly there was much more pace about Everton, the ball was zipped about with pace and precision and some wonderful build up play led to the decisive third. A series of 20 odd passes from side to side eventually found the excellent Kenny whose neat one two and run into the box led to the despairing lunge of Olsson clipping his heels, although the initial foul was outside the box. Chalk up another clusterfuck from Moss. Rooney stepped up and made amends for his earlier miss by burying his spot kick beyond Fabianski.

The final 10 minutes were played out at a more sedate pace although there was still time for Jonjoe Kenny to test out Fer’s notorious knees with a lunging sliding challenge that got nowhere near the ball and kicked off a 20 man melee which resulted in a couple of bookings and a few ruffled feathers. That was that and those that braved the December chills were sent home with smiles upon faces. A stiffer test to come though with the reigning champions next to visit L4 and a much stiffer test to face than was posed by South Wales’s finest.

Viva la revolucion


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